Somehow, the relationship and my zeal that I have with Him still seem pretty far from when I first started my walk with him. Maybe I am tired and sick that He is not doing much in facilitating me to know Him more. 2 amplified bible (I heart them a lot cause of all my personal notes and revelations that I wrote), countless treasured books that I bought, unnumbered sermon tapes and more bibles and personal journals that were thrown away, robs me of the initial passion that I used to have for Him. I look around me and I see a lot of my other friends who have it easier than me. I can’t help but grow so much in faith in Him in the initial months, but 5 years and counting I feel that there is not much difference in the situation where I can’t be liberal to express my faith in Him at home as much as I want to even after my dad got secretly saved. For God damn sake I want to escape to my own pad. %^$, ^%$#. This is not a war cry on my part to take pity on me, it’s just a random thought I have right now, on how &^ up and unfair life is. Maybe it’s just a wrong expectation that I have in God. Some expectations that I have placed in Him from day one has seem to be unmet. Its 2007 liao.

Emo moment over. *snap*
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I had the countdown at my best buddy’s house. We ushered in the New Year with praise and worship. I am glad I went over there and spend time with Ryan, Lydia, Matthew, Shile and Cindy albeit some awkward moments by some wet blanket morons.

Its 2007 and I need to find a gym buddy to work out only on weekends with me at fitness first. I hit the gym the first thing in the morning before I go to school during weekdays (6:30).

Happy New Year man. 2007 is a year of crazy destiny for me. *Woot*

Draw me close to You,
Never let me go,
I lay it all down again,
To hear You say that I am your child.